Parentification part 3: Healing from Parentification, Steps to Recovery

The process of healing from parentification requires time, self-compassion, and often professional support. Here are some steps to consider:

Recognising and engaging with the thought patterns:

• You may have a lot of thoughts such as:

• Start by engaging the unhealthy thought patterns and behaviours that stem from parentification. Take “My siblings are so privileged” as an example. Understanding that this is a learned response can help you begin to change them by:
  
  

  • Acknowledging these thoughts as just your own valid emotions especially given the circumstances and name these feelings to help gain control over it.

    “I’m jealous of my siblings because they got opportunities I didn’t get”

  • Challenging the thoughts that arise, especially those that assume negative intent from others, to reduce emotional charge that distorts reality.

    “It’s not my siblings’ fault they have different opportunities. They aren’t intentionally trying to hurt me”.     

  • Refocusing onto areas you can control and take proactive steps to change your situation. Identify actions you can take to rebalance responsibilities or make you feel more fulfilled.

    “I will focus on doing more things that make me more content such as pursuing hobbies or setting apart time for self-care”